Sunday, August 21, 2011

TB Free!

Kenny and I are healthy enough to adopt a baby! Lots of people we talk to comment about how strange and unfair it is that we have to get physicals, background checks, blood work, TB tests, driving records, and fingerprints in order to adopt. I'll be honest and say that it upset us, too, in the beginning. We were complaining about it one day, when one of our friends said it probably would be worse if the agency we went through didn't require all those checks, and he was right. As a result, we've had some great visits with our doctor, who is going through the same thing herself. It's nice that we can sit down and talk about the process with her, and not feel as if we have to mask any of our cynical or frustrating comments. It's difficult still to think about people who have babies really easily and those who aren't in the ideal situation to have babies, reproducing like rabbits, but we are slowly getting better at it. I still don't like hearing about students who are newly pregnant and don't seem to learn from others' mistakes, but if these pregnancies didn't happen then we wouldn't be talking about adopting, I guess. It's been a little hard going back to school and having parents at Open House ask me how many kids I have, but then I just joke and say I couldn't go home to a 13 year-old after spending the day with 100 of them, and they go back to their own concerns. I don't think I'm a worse teacher for not having my own child, but I'm sure some things will change once I do.

We head to a weekend workshop on Friday, and we passed all of our tests, so that means we're of sound mind and body to start this process. Lots of you have asked what is next, so here's some of what we'll learn this weekend:

How to write our Dear Birthmother/Birthparents Letter, which will be the focus of the brochure that we will share with others, and what the agency will take to their outreach locations.
Letter to our Personal Network, which tells us how to inform family and friends of our plans (too late for that).
Outreach Planning Guide- teaches us how to network
Adoption laws for most states
What to Do When a Birthmother Calls- this is our favorite. She could call us directly, and we have to be ready with an intelligent, calm response.
This is in addition to the paperwork we have completed over the last month. We wrote our autobiographies, answered questions about our views of parenting and discipline, and gotten guarantees from our bosses that we will probably be employed in the years to come. It was hard not to sound too teacher-y when I wrote about discipline, but By God, it's all about structure and consistency! Ha- I guess I learned something from Mrs. Holcomb after all!   

We'd like to thank everyone who has shown an interest in what we are doing. Don't be afraid to ask- we enjoy talking about it. We aren't really sure what happens next, but we will update soon. In the meantime, the fast-paced world of the Roosevelt Middle School 7th grade Volleyball B Team is in my future, and Kenny is working on music and artistic projects, so I'm sure we'll have little time to think about a baby. :)